Porn Rental [ER]
Jun 6th, 2011 by Dan

I already love Michael C. Hall from Dexter, but Ben Schwartz, who hilariously plays Jean-Ralphio on Parks and Recreation really sells this clip.

My Brush With Call of Duty [GO]
Jun 6th, 2011 by Dan

cod black ops

So bro, I played this sick game Call of Duty this past weekend and it was totally awesome. There was, like, a free weekend, so I played the multiplayer and I told all my bros, “Hey brahs, put away the beer pong, quit taking bong hits, pop your collar, and let’s get our Call of Duty on!”

Oh man, that’s real tough to shake. I keep lapsing into bro-speak ever since I played the free trial weekend of BLOPS, as I like to call it. Frattiness aside, CoD actually wasn’t that bad. In fact, I’d rather play CoD than Halo and I’d say it’s almost as good or better than Counterstrike.

The crux of what makes CoD so good is its persistent leveling system. It’s shocking how long it took game design to find it, but it’s a dangerously addictive system. See, every match you play and good thing you do in a game unlocks perks, weapons, and other modes. These unlocks end up propelling a player forward and making him want to keep playing. “I’ll quit once I hit level 10” was something I started telling myself about four matches and before I even came close. It kept me playing and interested in unlocking new classes and the ability to make custom classes.

Call of Duty’s other benefit is the relative fragility and realism behind its characters. It’s still a little less realistic than, say, Counterstrike where you can easily go down from two bullets, but it’s up there with realistic military shooters. Halo annoys me because of how sturdy everyone is. Call of Duty almost annoys me with how fragile everyone is, but that just makes me want to play even better. Forget that health auto-regens and you’ve got a system that works great for me.

Will I buy BLOPS? Probably not. It’s too close to the next CoD for me to invest in the game, but I might actually consider getting the next one if I hear that multiplayer remains just as good. Don’t worry, I’ll still be me, even if I get a little fratty…and…totally sick, brah.

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